Inherent beauty fading away...

It’s hard on a once-extremely independent and self-sufficient person when they realize they can’t get around or do as much as they once could and Pop-Pop is definitely no exception. When Mom-Mom became sick years ago, Pop-Pop retired at the age of 86 from working six days a week as a carpenter to take care of her. Years of less activity and increasing age resulted in him moving silently from independence to dependence. By the time Mom-Mom passed away, Pop-Pop was the second victim of her illness. Don’t get me wrong - he never regretted it one bit. Yet, permanently losing his independence was a hard pill for a once-proud carpenter to swallow.

Now unable to drive to a restaurant or hardware store like he once could, he now has to ask relatives to do household maintenance and chores he once enjoyed doing himself.

There are signs throughout the house he built for Mom-Mom of his trade- things that those who know and love him recognize with fondness and love. There is an old wooden shed he built in the backyard for garden tools and storing wood that's probably the only shed in the neighborhood with a crystal doorknob. The house’s wood window shutters have ornate iron hold-backs and still function to this day. Things like those abound around the house for those who take the time to notice. Although not as perfect as they once were, they still function and hold an inherent beauty not found in modern construction. It reminds me of Pop-Pop himself.

He may ask me and others to do chores he used to do, but that’s okay by me. I tell him he’s the house foreman now and know that many weekends I will arrive to a list of items of tasks. When he tells me how much it bothers him, I remind Pop-Pop that years ago, he was the young buck other people in his position had to ask – it’s a natural progression of life. Some chores are important and others not as much. Whether changing the batteries in the smoke detectors or cutting the grass, it’s important to me because I know it’s important to Pop-Pop.

Sometimes I think elderly relatives always seem to have something they need done is because they fear without them, the people they ask help from may stop coming around. Funny thing is that I go to Pop-Pop’s every weekend is because I love and enjoy him so much. My fear is that, at 93 with slowly failing health, I’m quickly losing what time I have left to spend with him… and I bet my fear outweighs his.

Why do I bring this up? People tend to get wrapped up in the petty stuff in life while what matters most slowly fades away. Like the crystal doorknob on the shed in his back yard, Pop-Pop has beauty in the stories he shares that I enjoy tremendously.

Time may be taking its toll on the outside, but if you look close enough…